We’ve met with the intention to do a guided meditation with the clear goal to find out more about ourselves.
I’ve started the narration like last time, yet every time symbols used and the way the intro is made depends on the people in the group. Leading the meditation makes one slightly less focused sometimes. This night, the outcome was very interesting for me as well.
When everyone leaves the circle, I’m still there. I can see them all leave. For some reason I chose to make another circle, just to choose my way in peace. Walking around, I’ve turned into the same nymph, that I turned into while exploring the fire element, almost 6 months ago.
This was surprising. I stood tall, having way different movements made me feel so light and careless. Walking didn’t feel the same way for me and I also enjoyed a way more nimble but also stronger body. Very strong actually, and still lean and effortlessly light.
I turned my head and picked the path that went south-east. Right where the tall old marble pillars ended, started a hill slope, overgrown in wild flowers, and I could see a forest on the bottom of the hill.
Suddenly, I felt like running, and from sprinting I even made a few leaps like a cheetah would do them, using my hands. That confused me a bit, since I clearly didn’t have paws but it felt so natural, that I didn’t think about it further. After few more long leaps on only my legs, I spread my arms and started flying. I had no wings, I flew just from the speed I reached and I reminded myself that flying with wings is for the real world, but there, I could do anything I wanted, and it didn’t need to make sense.
Under me, there was a seemingly endless forest, and I was looking for something interesting to explore. At that moment an old round roof appeared through the canopy and I instantly landed right on it.
At this point my focus must have been broken a little, since images of secluded huts that I knew and saw somewhere were trying to pop up in my mind. I calmed myself and made myself look what is REALLY there. Then the distracting images disappeared.
A round stone house. The roof was made of black stone slate and it was perfectly round with a chimney in the center. It was a very old house, front half was made of stone, back half was covered in soil all the way to the roof, like old viking houses, and the soil was long overgrown in grass and moos. The scent of forest soil and stone warmed by the sun was very real.
I entered the house and found myself in front of a half-circle shelf, which was made of massive wood, but the signs of time were all over it.
I’ve rummaged through the bottles and jars, and found one jar, filled with blueish salve that I instantly knew what to use for. Before opening the circle I burned my finger a little, on a candle and a blister already started to form, and it was painful as well. I’ve dipped my finger in the salve and slowly spread it over the burned area and the pain started diminishing, to fully disappear by the end of the meditation, same like the blister.
Near the jar was a flask, with a long thin neck, closed with a plug and sealed with bee wax. It was mine, I knew it and I took it. There was old leather bag hanging from the side of the shelf, I took it and stored the jar inside and hung the flask from the leather belt, obviously made for it, on the side of the bag.
Then I found a book. Looking through it, I could see writings and drawings but also some dry herbs, stuck to some pages. That was my book as well. The nice words, written with black ink simply burned themselves into my mind, and I knew that I should take it with me.
Outside, the dusk already started and I looked for a light source. As a human I’d look for fire. Yet as a nymph, rays of sun, still reaching the ground through the trees, were enough.
I sat down and started reading. As I progressed, I’ve started catching different scents and sounds around me. And I’ve realized that there is a tiny thin creek moving through the grass near me, on the forest clearing, with a small round pond, maybe rather deep puddle. I’ve packed the book and went on my knees and elbows down, so I can look at my face.
Big black eyes, without the white around, but not animal eyes. Cute face, with half wild features, nice small mouth, mouth angles pointing down, but otherwise proportional and familiar.
I’ve seen myself blink a few times in the water and was captured by the face that was looking back at me. Then I decided to get up and look around a little. Looking toward one edge of the clearing, toward the forest, I’ve spotted some light, like fire light, but behind something, rather someone.
There I’ve seen me, real me, sitting toward the forest, with a fire in front of me, and with my back toward the nymph me. I approached the familiar body and decided to have a better look at it. She was sitting near a small fire, deeply focused on something while meditating. And nymph me came closer, sat behind the real me and embraced me around the arms and upper body, leaning the head with fire dreads on my back and neck.
Then I heard myself saying: I’m choosing you.
And I shifted from the nymph, back to my real body and the circle in the room, where everyone was sitting.
It was surprising, that such a strong healthy creature would choose a body that I’m not too happy with and that needs some improvement in health. On the other hand, it made it more clear for me, that I’ve consciously chosen the totally imperfect body and I could feel all the love that the nymph had for it, before shifting back into it.
It made me think about the ways we take our bodies for granted.
I’m thankful to the fire nymph for guidance and the strong love she showed me.