Monthly Archives: April 2016

Drawing down the moon – 22nd April – Tala

The evening was chill and very relaxing from start.

After helping our fifth member, who was not present last week, to get in touch with his familiar, we did our full moon rituals and of course drawing down the moon.

Sometimes (well often) I just get overwhelmed by all the energy and the goddess presence, and I end up writing/channeling random stuff. This one was rather interesting, since I’ve heard 2 voices, but thinking that one of them was mine.


Goddess: Out of their way you should never go,
for trembling (scared) arms the cure still exists.
As it is not the nightly herbs or bitter pills that help,
but it’s the words you speak that create and extinct.

2nd voice: Over the fire I stand
and watch down on questions of yes or no,
to end or start it over,
in another body and another life.
Too long have I waited
to push the beasts away,
too long they’ve stepped on my lips,
rendering them silent,
too long I’ve been closed in
unable to scream.
A scream I let out, a scream
that shakes the Earth,
and breaks the boulders and bones
of legs that thread.

Goddess: From life thy stand up
and life you become,
to be on all the places
and to be on none,
to love all the souls that are yours
and to lose none.
As mother has spoken so will it be,
as words have created so will she leave(let be).

I don’t know the meaning of the second part, even though I could connect it to my life, but same to lives of many other people I know have suffered a lot.
Unlike on other nights, I felt also a rush of anger while writing. It was not mine, it came from outside. Wild anger over injustice and oppressed anger to that.

The people in the circle were already chatting about what they’ve experienced while I was still writing, and I know it was nobody of them. All in all, a very interesting experience, that I’ll have to study through a little more.

Blessed be!

19th April 2016 – Conjuration of familiar

Eurasian Lynx

Tonight, among other things, we conjured a familiar. I saw mine helping me from time to time, but I never bothered to call it. This time I decided that we should conjure it in proper Celtic ancient way, to stay. I was leading the conjuration chant, other three were repeating after me. No familiar stayed hidden. Each one of us were visited by their own. Finally, I got a good look of mine. It’s Eurasian Lynx. I knew the shape before, just it was transparent green all the time until now. Once, during meditation, I even shapeshifted into it.

It was a good night. We all got our summons answered.

11 April – Guided visualization – Tala

We’ve met with the intention to do a guided meditation with the clear goal to find out more about ourselves.

I’ve started the narration like last time, yet every time symbols used and the way the intro is made depends on the people in the group. Leading the meditation makes one slightly less focused sometimes. This night, the outcome was very interesting for me as well.

When everyone leaves the circle, I’m still there. I can see them all leave. For some reason I chose to make another circle, just to choose my way in peace. Walking around, I’ve turned into the same nymph, that I turned into while exploring the fire element, almost 6 months ago.

This was surprising. I stood tall, having way different movements made me feel so light and careless. Walking didn’t feel the same way for me and I also enjoyed a way more nimble but also stronger body. Very strong actually, and still lean and effortlessly light.
I turned my head and picked the path that went south-east. Right where the tall old marble pillars ended, started a hill slope, overgrown in wild flowers, and I could see a forest on the bottom of the hill.

Suddenly, I felt like running, and from sprinting I even made a few leaps like a cheetah would do them, using my hands. That confused me a bit, since I clearly didn’t have paws but it felt so natural, that I didn’t think about it further. After few more long leaps on only my legs, I spread my arms and started flying. I had no wings, I flew just from the speed I reached and I reminded myself that flying with wings is for the real world, but there, I could do anything I wanted, and it didn’t need to make sense.

Under me, there was a seemingly endless forest, and I was looking for something interesting to explore. At that moment an old round roof appeared through the canopy and I instantly landed right on it.
At this point my focus must have been broken a little, since images of secluded huts that I knew and saw somewhere were trying to pop up in my mind. I calmed myself and made myself look what is REALLY there. Then the distracting images disappeared.

A round stone house. The roof was made of black stone slate and it was perfectly round with a chimney in the center. It was a very old house, front half was made of stone, back half was covered in soil all the way to the roof, like old viking houses, and the soil was long overgrown in grass and moos. The scent of forest soil and stone warmed by the sun was very real.
I entered the house and found myself in front of a half-circle shelf, which was made of massive wood, but the signs of time were all over it.

I’ve rummaged through the bottles and jars, and found one jar, filled with blueish salve that I instantly knew what to use for. Before opening the circle I burned my finger a little, on a candle and a blister already started to form, and it was painful as well. I’ve dipped my finger in the salve and slowly spread it over the burned area and the pain started diminishing, to fully disappear by the end of the meditation, same like the blister.

Near the jar was a flask, with a long thin neck, closed with a plug and sealed with bee wax. It was mine, I knew it and I took it. There was old leather bag hanging from the side of the shelf, I took it and stored the jar inside and hung the flask from the leather belt, obviously made for it, on the side of the bag.

Then I found a book. Looking through it, I could see writings and drawings but also some dry herbs, stuck to some pages. That was my book as well. The nice words, written with black ink simply burned themselves into my mind, and I knew that I should take it with me.
Outside, the dusk already started and I looked for a light source. As a human I’d look for fire. Yet as a nymph, rays of sun, still reaching the ground through the trees, were enough.

I sat down and started reading. As I progressed, I’ve started catching different scents and sounds around me. And I’ve realized that there is a tiny thin creek moving through the grass near me, on the forest clearing, with a small round pond, maybe rather deep puddle. I’ve packed the book and went on my knees and elbows down, so I can look at my face.

Big black eyes, without the white around, but not animal eyes. Cute face, with half wild features, nice small mouth, mouth angles pointing down, but otherwise proportional and familiar.

I’ve seen myself blink a few times in the water and was captured by the face that was looking back at me. Then I decided to get up and look around a little. Looking toward one edge of the clearing, toward the forest, I’ve spotted some light, like fire light, but behind something, rather someone.

There I’ve seen me, real me, sitting toward the forest, with a fire in front of me, and with my back toward the nymph me. I approached the familiar body and decided to have a better look at it. She was sitting near a small fire, deeply focused on something while meditating. And nymph me came closer, sat behind the real me and embraced me around the arms and upper body, leaning the head with fire dreads on my back and neck.

Then I heard myself saying: I’m choosing you.

And I shifted from the nymph, back to my real body and the circle in the room, where everyone was sitting.

It was surprising, that such a strong healthy creature would choose a body that I’m not too happy with and that needs some improvement in health. On the other hand, it made it more clear for me, that I’ve consciously chosen the totally imperfect body and I could feel all the love that the nymph had for it, before shifting back into it.

It made me think about the ways we take our bodies for granted.

I’m thankful to the fire nymph for guidance and the strong love she showed me.


11th April 2016, group meditation – by Zela

The Souls Of Millions Of Lightyears Away

Obično u grupnim meditacijama unutar kovena ne vidim ništa. Dobra sam da sama ili sa dvoje, troje random ljudi vidim šta hoćeš, ali kada dođe trenutak da nešto ”moram” sad i odmah, eto drugarice blokade.

Ovog puta je bilo drugačije.

Kada je Tala otvorila krug i rekla nam da uzmemo baklju i uputimo se ka putu koji nas zove, instinktivno sam se okrenula ka severu iako sam minut pre bila uverena da je jug moj put za večeras.

Moja staza se uvijala odmah iza severnog stuba stapajući se sa nečim što je podsećalo na srednjovekovni krajolik pred sam zalazak sunca. Stisla sam baklju i zakoračila napred. Ono što je delovalo kao kaldrma iz daljine sada je više podsećalo na stazu po kojoj bi rado hodala Doroti iz Oza. Staza je očito vodila ka manjem gradu ugneždenom između dva brda. Kada sam prišla jedan deo mene je jako voleo da siđe stazom pored gradskih zidina do dela koji je podsećao na mesto na kom je mesec dana pre već bio Voxin. Međutim, ono što je mene maltene dozivalo bila je kula. Visoka, u sred samog grada. Stoga sam ušla u grad, prišla vratnicama kule, otvorila ih (nisu bila teška, to je čudno, zar ne) i odmah krenula da se uspinjem stepeništem koje naizgled ide do u beskraj. Sve vreme mi se ispred očiju smenjuje nečija duga zlatna kosa sa repom.. Nečeg. (Manje crtanih filmova za mene). Dolazim do odaje koju znam da tražim večeras. U njoj je već neko. Ili neki. Ne vidim ih dobro (kao kad zaboravim naočare), ali se ni ne bavim time. Jedino što svetli usred odaje je kolevka. Već znam šta ću naći u njoj. Ili barem mislim da znam. Od tog momenta kao da sam pripojena na Izvor čiste ljubavi. To traje sekund, možda dve, i nestaje. Prilazim, uzimam bebu. Deluje poznato. Devojčica je. I spava. Okrećem se od odaje i brzo silazim sa samo jednom mišlju u glavi – moram da izađem odavde i ne smem da padnem. Stepenice deluju kao da su od meda. Imam utisak da ću se srušiti svakog trena, ali ipak nastavljam. Na izlazu iz grada ne srećem nikog (što je čudno, veče je, idealno vreme za šetnju). Nešto me vuče da uđem u odaju pored izlazne kapije. Tamo se susrećem sa mladićem i starcem. Prvi me samo gleda, drugi je nagnut nad nekim spisima. Imam utisak kao da mene čekaju. Ali ništa ne govore. Okrećem se oko sebe. Levo od mene je metalna konstrukcija na kojoj će jednog dana biti haljina. Ne znam otkud mi to. Na stolu pored starca leži srebrni lanac sa priveskom. Ali oblik ne raspoznajem.

Odlučujem da je bilo dosta zabave za mene i odlazim sa detetom pravo nazad, do kruga, Ona sve vreme spava, gotovo da je nečujna. U krugu vidim ostale (okej, ovo je onaj morbidni deo na koji se ili navikneš ili ne). Na tren imam utisak da im vidim misli, ali brzo se otkačinjem od toga i prilazim svom mestu. Sedam. Beba se integriše sa mnom baš u onom momentu kad se ”vraćam u realnost”.

Na zidu naspram mene titra samo jedna reč. Zela. Ona koja zna put.


11th April 2016, group meditation – by Voxin

When we were ready in meditative state, just as the last time, in Ostara post , Tala created circle with pillars and we were to find a path where would we go. At North side, I’ve seen the same town I was before and I have decided not to go there this time. I saw two more paths. One led to a forest, common forest. Other one to the similar forest, but trees were glowing like a deep water luminescent jelly fish. I took that one and soon arrived to a small round lake.the_secret_lake_by_chris_karbach-d6bt52c_640

Lake was dark, but glowing beautiful likeit was made of a million stars and crystals. Those dots were emitting and reflecting light and the trees around it were glowing too in its dim bluish light reflections. Cracking in nearby tree branches revealed Artemis, smiling back at me and disappearing in the dark. Further along, Hecate was there, in her Mother appearance with her black dog and her wooden staff with silver crescent moon at the top, facing upwards. Then, on the opposite side of me, there were a blonde maiden, in her seventeens, dressed in white. She was calling to me silently and I slowly came around, passing beside Hecate who let me pass with no effort.

When I arrived near blonde maiden, she caressed my hair and I set down. She turned into a golden glowing nymph and were putting me to sleep by caressing my hair. I have been told that I really stated snoring. Next I remember, Hecate was above me, waking me and taking my hand and leading me away. Nymph was smiling and slowly disappeared in the dark. I thanked Hecate and was slowly walked back. Halfway there I met my beloved and we came back to the circle together. Then I slowly came out of meditation and back to the attic.